Changes

My job changed again today.
My cell phone bill is out of hand because of my job, but no steps to rectify it have been made.
I am slowly getting my head around everything but it's taking time.
Right now I wonder what the future holds.

Secrets

Come up to meet you
Tell you my feelings
You don't know how awesome you are
I had to call you
Tell you I miss you
Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets
And ask me your questions
Oh, let's go back to that bar
Friends all around us
We sit there quiet
Learning about who we are

You are a wonder
I want to know you
I need to know who you are
Can't see your secrets
Must ask the questions
Can't we go back to that bar
Nobody said it was easy
Oh I won't make it harder to part
Nobody said it was easy
Can't we go back to that bar

I have been wondering
Why we're so broken
Broken and scarred as we are
Tell me you know me
Come back to meet me
I want to rush to the start
Running in circles
Chasing tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's a shame that you don't know me
Nobody said it was easy
Oh, can't your heart make room for me

You have your family
I have mine, too
We have the time for disclosure
Your heart is heavy
Loving another
I need to say I care for you

Nobody said it was easy
Oh can't we go back to that bar
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to that bar

For Johnnie

I can see you through my tears
So far in the distance
I can see you reaching out
With no one to take your hand

I can hear you through the noise
Just on the other side
I can hear your soul reaching out
With no one to claim it

Anxiety
Apprehension
Caution
Lockdown

What will be on your mind?
The girl, the witch, the boy?
I only know what's on mine
Much I don't have words to say

I can't reach for you
I can't see you
But you know, and I know
We will be there anyway.



Please be safe, my dear friend. I miss you and await your return.

Quiet on the Home Front

Lots of things happening in my life so I have been pretty quiet lately. Work and family have kept me pretty busy!

Hopefully you'll hear from me soon!

Screw You

what ever happened
to courtesy
and common sense?
don't you understand
these things pay the rent?

it's one thing
to say your busy
it's another thing
to ignore and walk away

don't you see
this is my life
when you don't care
you may as well take it

right now I feel
worse than ever
just because all of you
gave me the middle finger

money wasted
time wasted
too much sacrifice
to continue unwanted

what in the world
did I do to you
to earn this epic
gesture of screw you?

Only Time

I'm here near this
empty chair

music and laughter
something's missing

your face, your eyes
the absence lingers

empty chair, empty glass
waits for you here

friends and loved ones
a piece is missing

A life
left behind

A soul
trapped in time

Will we ever
meet again?

Only time will tell

Standing There

I see the little boy
standing there
looking up at his father
with trust in his eyes

I see the father
standing there
smiling down at his son
with tears in his eyes

I see the family
standing there
anxiety all around
with fear in their eyes

I see the friends
standing there
support all around
with love in their eyes

we spy other soldiers
standing there
no one around
sadness in their eyes

everyone waiting
standing there
the time has come
with goodbye in their eyes

Time

I want to see you
tell you everything
will be alright
I would say anything
to help get you
through the night

I took my chance
to hear your voice
I know I'm a friend
That is your choice

Times are tough
and you're far away
I want you to know
that I'm here to stay

Your plane is leaving
You're off to war
Anxiety felt
as they close the door

Your love of country
for which you fight
In another land
with all your might

we're almost the same
your soul and mine
I am here for you
we only need time

Time to trust
Time to share
Time to see
Time to care

Soul

I know you can't see me
but I can see your soul
through thousands of miles
I can feel your pain

an empathetic soul
hoping to repair yours
one so broken
one so scarred

friendship and trust
are what I can offer
how you treat that
is yours to own

I will never betray you
confidence is kept
the sight of your soul
and all the scars

you say you are broken
and love can't be found
I object and say
you haven't really found it yet

our souls are old
we aren't very young
miles we have traveled
lifetimes we have lived

turn the page
on another chapter
in another book

my thoughts are with you
time is all we have
let's use it wisely

Soldier

anxious
worried
so much happened
news is grim

Reading
watching
betrayal and death
losing our ground

panting
gasping
Sand is blowing
the heat stifles

laughing
playing
cute little boy
Waits for him

hoping
praying
for safe return
people that matter

-----------

serve proudly my friend, and most importantly, return home.

Pokerface

nothing to lose
cards on the table
I'm all in
waiting for your turn

are you bluffing?
what's your game?
pretend you have nothing
then pull out a full house?

all I have
is a pair of aces
Queen high
I see your bluffing
I know your tell

do you know
that I know
this game
is ours to lose

Careless

watching
waiting
wondering
do you care at all?

your striking eyes
startles me
wakes me
from the nightmares

I see pain
I see need
I see someone
yearning for love
being wanted
being needed

I see people
milling about
lemmings, they are
minding their business
never reaching
outside their own worlds
never looking up
only looking down

do they see your pain?
do they see my pain?
do they care?
do you?

Cliffhanger

I see you
your reflection shines
on my soul

You see me
my reflection goes
where I don't know

I look into your eyes
and see brilliance
I see sadness
I see lonliness
That only a kindred spirit knows

Where do we go from here
Feels like a cliff
Standing on the edge with no gear
Do we jump
Do we fall
Do we trust

One must take the chance

Do you see in me
what I see in you
Or do you only see
what you lost before

My heart is willing
but my faith is shattered
My head fights it
saying I'm stupid

My hands are steady
I reach out to you
A few hours is all we have
If we make it
It's up to you

Lies

Trust me, he said
I've earned it
Believe me, he said
it gets better

Don't love me, he said
it's only going to hurt
Don't want me, he said
I'm too damaged

All he said were lies
Only I didn't know it
Too late I see
Promises were broken

Take my money
take my trust
take my faith
and flush it down

Take my fear
take my pain
take my hatred
and flush it down

Do they see what I've done?
Do they know what I've become?
Can I save myself from this?
Where did I go wrong?

Comfort
I can only find in them
the ones I see daily
the ones I pray for safety
the ones who look up to me
But I'm empty

Just Once

This weight
crushing down on me
wondering if I've said too much
or not enough

Wanting to trust someone
to love someone

This stage in life
everyone is broken
baggage follows
drama follows

We are defined by what we do
choices we make
paths we take
love we make

First chance I had
I said nothing
I became nothing
all I ask is for redemption

Take a chance
reach out from your comfort
take my hand
and let me pull you out
just once, it's all I ask

Defy what you think
what you see
what you know
define what follows
Decide to grow

Take the ashes
and the pain
fertilize something new
Shelter it
nurture it
care for it

It will grow
beyond your imagination